Cyborg Me
Posted in mundaneity, subservience
John Connor has failed us all! Skynet has taken over over! The machines have taken over!
No, wait. It was just me. Sorry. We're not really going to be used as batteries for a race of sentient machines while we live in a world that we think is real, no. What? Oh, wrong movie reference.
For the next 24 hours, I will be going about my usual business with a machine strapped to my arm and waist. Yes, I have finally invented a machine that replicates superhuman strength and I have decided to test it on myself because I am strongly against animal testing. No seriously, I have what is known as an ambulatory blood pressure monitor hooked up to me, which as the name implies, is supposed to monitor my blood pressure for a duration of 24 hours.
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| They did say I looked thinner and less Asian back then. |
Wearing it feels kind of weird. The device vibrates as it silently pumps the blood pressure cuff every half hour, then the readings get saved in it's hard drive. Amazing what technology can do nowadays, right? All I have to do now is wait for the data to be collected and have my cardiologist read it tomorrow. Hopefully we can find a way to eventually bring my blood pressure down. Otherwise I may have to quit my job again. No, that would definitely not be good.
Well I'm hoping that visiting four doctors in a span of two weeks will help me finally find a solution to this hypertension deal. I'm absolutely sick of being sick. You know, if this keeps up then there's no way that I'm gonna live on to a hundred. Oh wait, these days nobody does anyway. Bah humbug.
