The Hunger Pains  

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God I missed this. 

It's been quite a while since I last wrote, owing largely to the fact that there wasn't really much to write about; nothing I would personally consider publish-worthy at least. But for those who care, I've recently quit my job for reasons I am not at liberty to publicly discuss. Besides, I'm sick of talking about it anyway. And I've been happily bumming around ever since, although that empty wallet in my back pocket and this growling stomach hints at another life of humdrum subservience in my very near future.

Anyway, I've picked up on an old habit. I have started reading again. I figured, since JK Rowling's new book isn't coming out any time soon, and I haven't illegally obtained my copy of Dan Brown's latest page-flipper yet - a situation which will shortly be corrected - I decided to run my fingers through the virtual pages of Suzanne Collin's hit in PDF format, The Hunger Games.

Truth be told, If I could put the book down I would, but I couldn't. Not because I'm enthralled by the fast-paced action the book has to offer, but for a less thrilling reason: I just have to see it through to the end. That doesn't mean I like the book, in fact I would describe my feelings towards it as somewhere between slightly amused to utterly revolted.

You see, I hated the Twilight saga with a passion even before I read a single word of it. Judgmental as it is, I've seen plenty of movie trailers and read enough book reviews to know that "the saga" is just oozing with something I'm not too fond of - teen romance. I see Twilight as the unholy spawn of Underworld and Sweet Valley High. Yakfest written all over it. All you little girls out there may hate me now, but you'll thank me when you get older and eventually grow out of your teeny werewolf fantasies. 

So when I started reading The Hunger Games, I was at a point then where I had little to no expectations about this particular trilogy. Big mistake. From the odd little bits of information I've gathered, The Hunger Games was supposedly a story about survival, and fighting against oppression. And yes, it was. What I didn't expect was that the whole action-adventure scheme revolved around a sappy love triangle between sixteen year-olds. I mean, everything draws from how the heroine, Katniss Everdeen, struggles to find direction, and a sense of certainty about how she felt towards two strapping young dudes, Peeta and Gale

First of all, who gives names such as Peeta, Haymitch, or Cinna to their kids? And to be honest, reading the whole thing feels like reading Katniss' diary because it is written from a first-person perspective, thus spewing heart-stopping lines such as:

Impulsively, I lean forward and kiss him, stopping his words. This is probably overdue since he's right, we are supposed to be madly in love. It's the first time I've ever kissed a boy, which should make some sort of impression I guess, but all I can register is how unnaturally hot his lips are from the fever.

For crying out loud! They were in a fight for their lives, and the boy had a freakin' fever! And Suzanne Collins thought it was obviously the perfect time for a first kiss. This more or less confirmed my suspicion that The Hunger Games was nothing more than a teen romance novel cleverly disguised as an action flick. This might be one of the few times I'll ever like the movie more than I liked the book. 

For those who loved the book though, I offer my sincerest apologies for my rant. Don't get me wrong, The Hunger Games does make for good reading, but it doesn't place high in my top ten list of reads. I'd sooner wipe my ass with it if it weren't in PDF format, and I know I'd look stupid wiping my derriere with my phone or my laptop. But as I said, I'll give it a fair shake and I'll read it all the way through to book 3, Mockingjay. Who knows? I might even like it. I'll just be ready with my barf bag for now I guess. 

Oh God they're kissing again!

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Stories from the Simian Crease by Binchee is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Philippines License.
Based on a work at binchee.blogspot.com